a tapestry of trust.

lately i have been trying to find my "nitch". you know, that place or thing that just suites you perfectly. for some, it may be dance, others sewing. i have been experimenting with music, yoga, art, etc etc. and all i have come up with is, "yes, i enjoy all these things, but they are not sufficient."(if you know where this is going, shhh) through the course of trying to find out my "thing" i have been lacking my trust in the Lord. i still do indeed trust him; he is my God. but, i feel as if he is not the center of it all, which is so imparitive to growth.

as a few of my friends have been talking about lately, we need to be kids again. like a boy about to let go of the handlebars for the first time to balance with no hands. like a little girl jumping off the trampoline into her daddies arms. children trust in their mums and dads. they trust in some divine spirit to keep them balanced on a bike. they dont know how they do it, they just do. we need to tap back into this lost tapestry of trust, because that is what trust is, one big blanket that saves us. the child would fall without the "blanket of trust" surrounding them.

so, good ol' scattered brained me is really trying to say that yes, i enjoy the things i do, but as i do them, i need to place Christ completely in my heart. He needs to pump blood through my heart, he needs to be the center of it all.

also, because i have lost this tapestry of trust, i have begun to take many things to heart. i have been getting offended at things which simply showcase the brokenness of our world. it has nothing to do with ME, but i have been warping and twisting it so that it does concern me. i need to let go and place it all in the palms of Jesus.

with hands and heart open wide, i surrender all.